This was sent by me at 10 to 7. I can't tell you who I sent it to and as you can tell it is mostly about me and I finally agreed that I would show it even though people will be reading it. I am truly confident about my decision. As I was typing this letter to the person I saw emotion in my face and I realised that it was time to face the facts. As you read the letter I guess some of you will probably realise who I sent this to.
I don't know if you got this or not because I don't know if the address is right. There is one thing I want to say but I can't say unless I write it down because I haven't got the courage to say it out loud. People are filled with emotions and I know that from just seeing people everyday, by reading body language. When I was a couple of years younger I thought emotions could only exist in films and familiar, but now there is no way of describing ones feelings. I feel loads of things inside me and some I can't control.
There is joy whenever I am happy because when I am happy I am more than just that I love and understand people more like my brothers for example.
When I am sad I can't explain how sad. I just want to sit down and cry and that is what sometimes happens, as I'm sure you know.
When I am angry you know that I can't hold it in and I burst out on every person I meet.
When I am caught by surprise I laugh when it is a good surprise and smile and it is the same as when feel happy.
When I am caught in a horrible surprise I start yelling and hitting people for no reason. This is one I can't control as by now I am sure you realise. After that I realise what I have done and burst into tears. I can never control my emotions and they get the better of me. You may have realised by now that I definitely might not be able to hold them like other people can. (You for instance)
Sometimes I can tell you're tired and want to lie down but you carry on and sometimes I just don't think that you realise how much I admire you. You sometimes think that I may be brat but I tell no lie and admit that maybe I am but sometimes that emotion is caused by grief.(Nanny M)
I will stop writing now and hope you understand where I am getting at. I am not saying anything against anybody but maybe myself.
Maybe you will understand emotion as I understand it and I will understand emotion as you will see it as I get further through life but maybe for now I am better off not wanting to ever understand anything and just sit and watch Dora and noddy as I did when I was little.